The last time
I wore this pair of underwear, I got fucked
in the ass so deep they gave me deferred standing.
All I had to do to get a break from school
was explore the wilder side of campus life.
I actually don’t really know what to do
with all of this free time now. Work on my papers?
Who do I look like, April? Look,
we don’t all want to go
to law school and save the world from itself.
Some of us
just want to coast on our trust fund and see if that cute boy
from Kappa Sigma can go more than two rounds.